So the other day as I was doing laundry, the nail on my middle finger bent all the way back. It hurt soooo fucking bad.
Eventually (later that day in the shower–because the water was irritating the sore) I started to think about how bodies feel pain. Neurons fire this energy and we feel a physical sensation right? a stinging, a burning, a thumping..
A change occurs. Something was intact a certain way and all of a sudden it broke.
So then, I started to think about how change and pain work emotionally. Most of the pain I encounter, as I feel many others could relate too, is mental and emotional.
This may sound obvious but I really asked myself “If we feel pain when things change physically why not emotionally”and what I was really asking was, “why do we easily accept and understand the change within physical pain, but reject it when it’s emotionally charged? We fight our pain, we ignore how we really feel and distract ourselves to suppress till we end up suffering.
What happens when we recognize our feelings and allow them to be felt? When we become aware of the changes without attaching our self-worth to them?
For about a year I have been heavily working on healing myself. With this comes a lot of feeling into old wounds and transmuting them with compassion. It also entails developing new habits that align towards working on what you’re becoming aware of, instead of falling victim to the story like before.
I say all this to say that this is where you gain from the pain. (I had an aha moment with the quote “no pain no gain” haha). Ultimately that change is making space for something new, and I’m a firm believer that it’s always for your greatest good.
Change is uncomfortable, but it’s also inevitable. This time, try to ease into your pain instead. Ask yourself what you are feeling and why. Feel it in your body, and then, most importantly, let it go.
I apologize if the flow of this is confusing or if certain things need to be elaborated on. Please let me know if there are any questions or thoughts. I love discussing sensibilities. I’m still getting into the swing of this blogging thing, and trying to figure out what needs to be said is daunting. While this is a write up of my internal dialogue, I want to make sure it can be comprehended because the purpose is to help others and not just myself. Thanks for being here!
– alle rae