and this time too

and this time too

will be something you’ve gotten through

it’s time to plant something new

that hole in your heart will do

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recluse

she feels so stuck. only here she feels free. but she’s trying to move away from the absolutes. she clings to their frigidity, their motionless and unwavering spirit. she strives to be like them. strong. frim in their decisions of extremity.  analyzing the grey space is tiring. she tells herself to keep breathing but she feels like the air isn’t circulating properly. her lungs are whispering: open

her bones are shaking and her fears are right in front of her

she won’t let them win because she never does. but what is never, if it really means sometimes?

how absolute is absolute anyways?

 

To you

I don’t think any of my friends, family, or loved ones really, read this extension of my mind. Which is okay, I don’t expect anyone to. But I wanted to write this for them..

So if you’re reading, and you love me, this is to you…

most times I’m thinking of you

sorrowed and trying

to muster up the love

i know you care to hear from me

or at least i think

because

i think for both of us

and most days I’m changing

and i haven’t the heart to

let you see me

broken as i am

but i love you

i love you

i love you